Rethinking Church, Family, and Authority
Today marks my first full day as a fifty-two-year-old. Looking back on the past year, I realize I’ve accomplished far more than I’ve given myself credit for. I spent the last year coming to terms with childhood trauma as I understood it—trauma that was only deepened by church indoctrination. I was taught that I needed saving, that I was inherently broken, and that my role as a husband and father was to rule my household with an iron fist, without question or mercy.
Side note: this is not what Jesus taught.
But here’s the thing—church teaching gets it wrong. People don’t need someone to save them. They need someone to show them how to save themselves when they’re trapped in a never-ending cycle that leads nowhere, reinforcing a “victim” mentality. And that rigid, authoritarian approach to family life? It’s not just spiritually harmful—it’s legally dangerous. The idea that a husband must dominate his family is deeply ingrained in many Fundamentalist and United Pentecostal (UPC) churches across Nebraska, particularly in more conservative circles near Omaha. Yet, it rarely gets questioned within church walls—until, of course, another scandal breaks out, and we see the consequences unfold in courtrooms instead of prayer meetings.
The Bible presents a hierarchy, yes, but not the tyrannical system these churches promote. Ephesians 5:25 states, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.” That’s not a call to domination—it’s a call to sacrificial love. Christ didn’t lead with an iron fist. He led by serving, by lifting others up, by embodying humility and compassion. Yet, in these stricter church environments, submission is weaponized. It becomes less about love and more about control—turning biblical guidance into a distorted power structure that conflicts with the very scripture it claims to uphold.
Fiscal Responsibility Among Church Leadership
Churches need to stop telling new converts they need saving. Really now—how is that anything more than a ploy to invade people’s personal lives while making them feel obligated to hand over their money? Think about it. Does the Bible truly justify pastors fleecing their congregation in the name of greed? Shouldn’t the pastoral staff—however many there are—be independently employed, supporting the church through their own means rather than guilt-tripping people into filling collection plates?
I’ve known pastors who understood this. One led a Presbyterian-Baptist combined congregation in rural Nebraska. He worked full-time as a housekeeper and maintenance man at a nursing home—an honest living. Another was a student when I knew him, balancing a telesales job while earning a finance degree. That degree later allowed him to start his own financial planning company, Fire My Mortgage, run by James Murphy from Council Bluffs, Iowa.
My point is simple: If a minister wants to establish themselves, shouldn’t they fund it independently rather than relying on tax-exempt status while peddling their belief system? That’s exactly why my wife and I don’t ask for donations or take advantage of tax shelters or religious exemptions. It gives us complete control over how we run our ministry and share our message—without financial or political strings attached.
My Colorful Past Made Me The Seeker I Am Today
Brothers and sisters, listen close, for I come with a word that might shake the dust off the bones of tradition and light a fire in the hearts of those unafraid to seek!
The Lord said, “Seek, and ye shall find!” But He never said WHERE you’d find it! He never said you’d find it in the pews of a stiff-lipped congregation, nor in the hushed whispers of a prayer circle afraid to ask hard questions. NO! He said SEEK! That means search, question, knock on doors you were told to leave shut!
Let me tell you about a young man—oh, let me PREACH it—this boy was no more than a child when the hunger hit him, that deep-down craving to know why the stars danced in their patterns and why men swore they could read their stories. He read the horoscopes, traced constellations with eager fingers, and wondered if the universe itself was whispering secrets to him.
But the church folk—they clutched their pearls, they pointed their fingers! “That ain’t of God!” they cried. So the boy ran to the only place that would have him—the fire-breathing, tongue-speaking world of the Word of Faith Movement. Oh, the promises were mighty! “Speak it, and it shall be so! Claim it, and it is yours!” they said. But when the blessings didn’t rain, when the heavens didn’t split open at his command, he began to ask, “Is this truly all there is?”
And oh, let me tell you—the questions only got louder! He found himself drawn to the forbidden texts, the dusty old books that preachers feared. Gnostic gospels, Hermetic teachings, the wisdom of the old world that spoke of a truth not bound by pews or pulpits. He didn’t just believe—he KNEW. And knowing set him free!
Now, let me tell you about the whispers, the warnings, the scandal that followed! “He’s backslidden,” they said. “He’s fallen into darkness!” But I tell you THIS—what they call darkness is only light unchained!
And when he walked this path into adulthood, when he embraced not just the spirit but the flesh—oh, that’s when the old fire-and-brimstone crowd lost their minds! Because let me tell you something, church: the body is NOT the enemy of the soul! The joys of the flesh are NOT the chains of the devil!
By his fifties, he and his beloved wife stood hand in hand, unashamed of where life had led them. They didn’t cower before the judgment of those who hid their own sins beneath polished Bibles. No! They embraced the fullness of life—sensuality, passion, and love without the boundaries that fear and shame had built.
And when another entered their lives, close to them both, sharing in their journey, they did not cast stones at themselves. They did not beg for forgiveness where no sin had been committed. They walked forward, fearless, into a truth that religion could never chain.
So let me ask you, church—WHO TOLD YOU TO BE ASHAMED? Who told you that the God who made the heavens and the earth, who wove your desires and passions into your very being, wanted you to live a life of denial? WHO LIED TO YOU?
The truth is not found in the clenched fists of angry men in suits. It is not locked behind church doors. It is in the wild, unshackled spirit of the seeker, the one unafraid to explore, to love, to LIVE!
So walk boldly, seekers of truth! Walk without fear! For it is not the wrath of God you should fear, but the small men who try to speak for Him!
Awakening to the Truth: A Minister's Introspective Journey
Brothers and sisters, gather close, for I bring a message that may shake the very foundations of your beliefs and ignite a flame in the hearts of those daring enough to explore the depths of their own souls!
The Lord urges us, “Seek, and ye shall find!” Yet, He never dictated where that search might lead! We often confine our exploration to the sacred confines of church pews or the quiet reverence of prayer. But NO! He said SEEK! This calls for a daring quest beyond the familiar, a fearless questioning of the doctrines that bind us!
Let me take you on a journey, to a time when visionaries like Aleister Crowley and Anton LaVey dared to challenge the established norms. Crowley, known as the “Great Beast,” urged humanity to embrace its primal instincts, to throw off the shackles of moralistic dogma that stifled authentic living. LaVey, founder of the Church of Satan, echoed this sentiment, advocating for a celebration of the self, the flesh, and the pleasures of life.
These thinkers faced harsh scrutiny from a society that clung to rigid beliefs. The world labeled them as heretics, but perhaps, in their controversial teachings, they were merely holding a mirror to our collective denial of our carnal nature. They prompted us to ask, what if embracing our desires is not the path to damnation, but rather a route to true liberation?
As I reflected on their messages, I recalled the poignant lyrics of Ozzy Osbourne in “Paranoid.” He speaks of a restless search for meaning, a cry for understanding amidst chaos. The haunting refrain resonates deeply: “Can you help me?”—a profound question that echoes through time, as we all grapple with our existential crises and the societal chains that bind us.
History is rich with examples of those who ventured down this path of self-exploration, such as the Romantic poets, who rebelled against the constraints of their era, finding beauty in passion and the human experience. They understood that to live fully, we must embrace all facets of our being, even the darkest corners that society often shuns.
And so, I find myself standing at a crossroads, grappling with the implications of these teachings. The weight of tradition has kept many of us in a state of spiritual enslavement, shackled by guilt and fear. Yet, in embracing our humanity—our desires, our pleasures, and even our doubts—we find a path to liberation, an awakening of the spirit that transcends the confines of conventional faith.
So I ask you, dear church—WHO TOLD YOU TO FEAR YOURSELF? Who conditioned you to believe that the God who crafted the universe, who imbued you with passions and desires, wished for you to live in denial? WHO DECEIVED YOU?
The truth is not locked away in the dogmas of the past; it breathes in the wild spirit of the seeker, the one who dares to explore, to love, to truly LIVE!
So walk boldly, seekers of truth! Embrace your journey with courage! For it is not the wrath of God you should fear, but the limitations imposed by those who fail to understand the vastness of His grace!
Breaking the Chains of Control: The Power of Independent Thought
Political control:
Throughout history, political powers have sought to dominate the minds of the masses, imposing rules and regulations that serve their interests while suppressing dissent. From oppressive regimes to modern-day authoritarianism, we see how those in power manipulate narratives to maintain control, often invoking fear to stifle independent thought.
Religious control:
Religion, too, has played a pivotal role in shaping society, wielding authority over the hearts and minds of people. Religious institutions have historically dictated moral codes that often stifle personal freedom, promoting blind faith over critical inquiry. The echoes of the past resonate through infamous events like the Salem Witch Trials, where fear and ignorance led to the persecution of those who dared to think differently.
Both political and religious rhetoric shackle us with fabricated rules designed to pacify the masses and preserve the status quo. Consider the impact of the original King James Bible—while it was a monumental achievement in making scripture accessible, it also served as a tool for political control, shaping ideologies that influenced governance for centuries. The aftermath of such control can be seen in the stifling of scientific inquiry, where thinkers like Galileo faced condemnation for challenging the prevailing beliefs of their time. Many have suffered dire consequences, including censorship, exile, and even execution, all in the name of preserving the power of those in charge.
As we reflect on these historical injustices, we must recognize that the attitude of suppressing independent thought still pervades many fundamentalist and "Holy Roller" churches today. This mindset, rooted in fear and conformity, often leads to social alienation, branding those who dare to question as outcasts or fools. Yet, it is through critical thinking and independent research that we can break free from these chains of control.
We must embrace the courage to question, to seek out knowledge beyond the confines of dogma, and to challenge the narratives imposed upon us. In doing so, we reclaim our power and foster a society where progress is not hindered by fear but propelled by inquiry and understanding.
Let us be the seekers of truth, the bearers of independent thought, and the champions of a future where knowledge reigns supreme over ignorance!
Embracing the Goddess Within: A Journey to Redemption
Brothers and sisters, let me share a tale of transformation, a parable of a woman whose quiet spirit was ignited by the flames of self-discovery and liberation!
Once upon a time, in a world not so different from our own, there lived a woman named Mysti. A shy soul by nature, she often felt confined by the expectations of society, her heart yearning to break free from the chains of modesty that held her back. Society taught her that her body was a source of shame, that to be virtuous meant to hide her beauty behind layers of fabric and restraint.
But deep within her, Mysti felt the stirring of something ancient, a call that echoed through the ages—the voice of the goddess. Inspired by the vibrant celebrations of ancient Roman and Greek festivals that honored goddesses of fertility and sensuality, she began to explore the depths of her desires. These festivals, filled with laughter, music, and revelry, celebrated the female form as sacred, a vessel of creation and life.
Embracing this newfound understanding, Mysti transformed her wardrobe, donning attire that reflected her inner goddess—clothes that sparkled, flowed, and embraced her curves. She became what she affectionately referred to as a "Temple Priestess," stepping into her role with pride as she adorned herself in garments reminiscent of those worn by dancers at sacred rituals, celebrating life and love. Every day felt like a festival as she walked through the world, radiating confidence and joy.
In her journey, Mysti discovered that true redemption lies not in conformity, but in authenticity. She learned that her body was not a source of shame, but a sacred vessel that deserved to be celebrated. With each passing day, she shed the fears that had held her back and embraced the freedom that came with owning her identity.
As her husband, the leader of their pagan ministry, witnessed her transformation, he rejoiced in her courage and spirit. Together, they created a space where others could embrace their own carnal nature without judgment—a sanctuary where they honored the divine feminine, celebrating the beauty and power of womanhood.
In the end, Mysti's story became a beacon of hope for those who felt constrained by societal norms. She showed that by embracing our true selves, we can unlock the doors to self-acceptance and love. Just as the ancient festivals celebrated the goddess within, so too can we find redemption in acknowledging our desires and living authentically.
So, my friends, let us cast aside the shackles of shame and step boldly into our own truth! May we honor the divine within us all, celebrating the beauty of our existence and the power of embracing our carnal nature!
